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11.16.2010

PARTS ARE RELATIVE

Bodies are strange when you think about them.  I mean, we have all these delicate inner organs (much like the inner workings of a fine Swiss watch) that are connected, suspended, somewhat dependant on each other and they are merely covered by yet another organ - skin.   You have to think that if what we can see on the outside of each other is so varied, our internal organs might have slight unique variations also.  I mean, maybe my spleen if laid out on a table next to yours, would be slightly crafted a bit different in size, shape or hue - that is if still connected to the blood supply :)  Skin color variations are amazing too.  Different measures of pigment create different shades of skin.  That's not even addressing eye color or hair color!  I once had an MRI of the brain.  The report read something like this; patient noted to have larger than normal sinus cavities.  Polyp noted on left side sinus cavity.   So now I know that I have ginormous sinus cavities and taking up space in one of them, a polyp.  I suppose my larger than normal sinus cavities sit in radical size contrast to other body parts I possess.  For instance my grand four-lane highway for breasts highlight my near child-like upper body where you can actually see ribs. Yes, ribs and not the meat kind slathered in BBQ sauce.  If you don't believe me, there are a few people who can verify the above sentence.  E-mail me for their contact information :)   At the doctor last week I was bent over the examining table, pants down, awaiting the nurse's antibiotic shot.  She said she was using a pediatric needle to administer this ADULT does of medicine.  I jokingly asked if she was using that kid's needle because she thought my butt was small.  "Yes!" she replied.   Then there is the issue of the size of my head.  I'm not sure if proportionally it fits on my body.  My oldest sister has this little tiny head while my middle sister and I have in comparison to hers, monstrous heads.  You know I've never been measured for a hat size.  That would be interesting!  If the three of us sisters take a picture together it's quite humorous.  We now always place our tiny headed oldest sister in the middle of the two big headed younger sisters.  It balances out the picture like two candlesticks on a fireplace mantle.  I am 5'5' and nearly 3' of that height is my torso.  Sitting next to people who are inches and inches taller than me I tower over them.  My ex-husband was one of them.  He hated that.  If I could move that long waistedness to my legs, well modeling world beware.  Do you think Vogue or Cosmo is in need of a big headed, large sinus cavity, small breasted, ribs showing, no butt, long waisted, estrogen and collagen waning woman in her mid-forties?

1 comment:

  1. Ooohhhhhhhhh they'll never be fully prepared for
    the REAL Big L!! Cause 40 year olds....well....they know stuff! Blair catalog called and they are looking for some fresh new models. The world awaits.

    ReplyDelete