I'm not a fan of the phrase, "How are you?".  It is one of the many over used and under meant sentences we use in our culture.  Think of the times you are in the bank, the gas station, a store in the mall, a restaurant, work, even at church and someone asks you, "How are you?".  In Americanese it's paramount to saying "Hi".  Flippantly it can roll off our tongues without a thought of really wanting to know how someone is.  Have you ever tried to be gut wrenching honest when asked that question just to see how the questioner will respond (knowing they are really only expecting a good, great or ok response)?   I've tried that a time or two to those who want to pose that question with what appears to be a great deal of non-caring insincerity.  It has taken a few back:)   It could just be my way of thinking, my desire to be purposeful in living life that causes me to NOT ask that question casually, but expectedly, wanting to know truly how the person is.  My comeback to a response of "good or ok" is, "Really?  What's making it good or what's making it merely ok?"  That causes some to stop and realize that the question was asked in sincerity and that I do care.  I've heard some amazing responses from that second question - confessions of truth, relief that they can be honest of how they are really feeling, comfort that someone took time to look a little further into their words and their world.  There have been times I too have been asked that "how are you" question and I have responded, "Well, are you sure you really want to know?" :)   I love questions.  I'm sure it is directly linked to my questing mind and spirit, my love of people and my desire to leave someone better than I found them.  There are big things in life that create huge tsunami's, but mostly I believe life is small waves - small touches that slowly over time impact others.  Those small things like a sincere "how are you" give people value and make them feel that someone truly cares.  Today as you move about your world and bump into others around you, why not try saying, "How are you?" with sincerity.  It's actually quite an ice breaker which can open up a world of conversation and a way to touch the life of someone.  BTW:  How are you today?

1 comment:

  1. I am doing grand thank you for asking. You musta hated working and hanging with me as I say that, like, all the time. Does "what's shakin bacon" count? For the record I really do care how ppl are...for the most part anyway. There's a know...