If you've ever watched the show, "Malcolm In The Middle" you might know the theme song, "Boss of Me" by They Might Be Giants.  I can identify with the words of the chorus....You're Not The Boss Of Me Now!   Someone mentioned to me recently about my strong independent ways and whether they are a result of the life I had to live or my personality.  Immediately my mind went to kindergarten.  Unfortunately I would like to say that because of circumstances in my adult life, I became that way.  It's not true or even remotely accurate though.  What my life circumstances created was the ability to survive, even live and move forward, despite what was placed on my shoulders because of my strong and independent personality.  I'm thankful looking back that God gave me that personality because without it, I don't know if I would have survived or been as relatively whole as I am (that might be subjective too!).  There is no documentation to prove it, but I might have exited my mother's womb without a cry, possibly wide awake and wanting to do it myself:)  When I got to kindergarten I had a clear sense of what should be and set to making it that way.  There was a play kitchen in the classroom and during play time I commanded its space.  I also commanded everyone who wanted to play in it:)  I could read at age 4 so when I went to kindergarten and they passed out our first report card, I opened mine up and read all the teacher comments on conduct, etc.  Reading the comments I noted that my teacher, Mrs. Holloway (a very proper, orderly and cool handed teacher), had written that I was sometimes bossy.  What!   Me?  I can remember feeling a bit hurt by that at 5 years old and wondering why she would have said that.  How was orchestrating a whole kitchen and the activities that occurred in it with such efficiency and excellence being bossy?  Giving the report card to my parents I saw a smile cross both of their faces.  There wasn't any scolding, or really conversation regarding what she wrote.  I am thoroughly convinced that my parents, clearly seeing my personality bent, knew it would do no good.  They merely smiled in acknowledgement and understanding of what Mrs. Holloway had said.  On the day my parents dropped me off at college, my dad unsure of his emotions of losing his last daughter, on his exit from my dorm room stated, "Lynn, don't boss your roommate around.":)  I have taken personality tests through the years, while a teenager and in my adult life either in a church setting or through corporate trainings.  There is a similar thread in all the tests I have taken - independent and strong - choleric.  There is a thread of strong, decisive, independently free spiritedness that propels most things that I do and who I am.  It is what has allowed me to move forward when others would not have been able to.  It is what allows me to live without fear totally crippling me despite circumstances that have been daunting at times.  It is also what allows me to truly believe anything can be done - even if I don't know how to do it presently there is a way.  BTW, on the kitchen thing - if you came to my house I would most definitely let you play with me in the kitchen and wouldn't even boss you around - now that's progress!!

No comments:

Post a Comment