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3.29.2011

DON'T SHOW YOUR TEETH

Have any of you been to the Bureau of Motor Vehicles, Secretary of State or whatever your state license branch is called lately?  I've been there as a sort of regular in the past year.  I think the last several times I was there they yelled my name "Lynn" loudly as I entered much like "Norm" on the show Cheers.  If I counted correctly I have actually waited in line in the Bureau of Motor Vehicles approximately 7 times in the last year.  It's a side effect of divorce, retitling cars, taking your maiden name back, retitling cars again, remarriage name change, retitling cars again, buying a vehicle.  Twice in the past year I have had to update my driver's license which involves a new picture.  Can't say that I am a fan of pictures of myself to begin with.  But, getting photographed for your driver's license, which you will carry and show to nearly every merchant for the next four years, is most definitely not high on my list of favs.  I'm not totally sure why in my state the license branch has adopted a "NO TEETH SHOWING NO SMILE" picture policy, but they have.  Standing in front of that drab curtain, feet perfectly aligned on the taped X on the floor, I am already feeling quite vulnerable.  The curtain is suspended from the ceiling and everyone sitting, waiting like lab rats in the chairs behind me, can see my mid-calf to my feet.  I know what they are thinking, "That lady is getting her picture taken.  I hate that.  I'm sure it won't be a flattering picture just like mine wasn't."  As I stood there the state employee said, "Tip your head to the left.  Too far, go back to the right a bit.  Ok, don't show your teeth."  There was a blinding flash like a solar flare and a loud CLICK.  As I am trying to regain my vision from temporary license branch blindness, she states that the picture came out fine and prints out a temporary paper version for me until the real license comes via mail to me in 7-10 days.  I laughed at the picture, both this one and the one from the license picture from a few months earlier when I had taken my maiden back.  Possibly the Bureau of Motor Vehicles has this no teeth/no smile policy to allow police officers to more readily identify criminals (most are not smiling while being arrested and booked) to a picture in the state ID bank.  The only thing prohibiting me from being a criminal, according to the look on my face from my license picture, was the rectangular sign that is held in front of someone being charged and booked.  The thing is, I have smiled and said thank you to a police officer after a traffic stop which would now not match my no teeth/no smile license picture.  I think all of humanity just looks better when they smile - criminals included!

1 comment:

  1. when criminals smile on their mugshot I tend to judge them...just sayin

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